Ages 3 to 6
Vivi learns to calm down
A story about joy, anger, sadness and fear
Clínica Vivaldi
Vivi is a little bitch who lives by the woods.
Every day he feels many things. Some are gentle, like the breeze. Others are strong, like the storm wind.
In the morning, Vivi plays with her friend Tilo. They jump, they run, they laugh.
Vivi feels joy: They make you want to jump and hug everyone.
For the adult: Question: Where do you feel joy? In the belly, in the legs, in the face?
Tilo accidentally knocks down Vivi's tower.
Vivi notices a heat that rises and rises. She clenches her fists. She wants to scream. anger.
Vivi remembers a trick: when the anger rises, it stops.
Smell a flower slowly and blow a candle slowly. One, two, three times.
For the adult: Practice together, smell the flower, blow out the candle when you're calm. That way he only comes out when he has to.
The anger goes down. Vivi says: "I got angry because my tower fell down."
Tilo says, "Sorry. Shall we do it again together?"
In the afternoon, Tilo goes home.
Vivi is left alone and she notices a lump in her throat. sadness. They make you want to cry.
Vivi's going to get Dad. Dad doesn't tell her not to cry.
She says, "You're sad because you miss Tylo. Crying for a little while with someone next to you helps.
For the adult: Validating means saying out loud what they feel and why. You don't need to fix it.
At night, something cracks the window.
Vivi's heart starts racing. It's fear.
Vivi is calling Mom. They light a lamp, and look together: it is a branch that the wind moves.
Vivi hugs her stuffed animal and breathes slowly.
For the adult: Looking at what's happened together helps more than saying "it's okay".
Vivi gets into bed. Today, joy, anger, sadness and fear have passed through his house.
None of them are bad. And Vivi already knows what to do.
Your calm box
When an emotion is too big, you can try what Vivi does.:
Smell the flower and blow out the candle. Three times, very slowly.
Ask for a hug from someone who loves you.
Say it with words: I'm angry, I'm scared, and I'm sad.
Hug your teddy or your blanket.
Draw how you feel.
And now you, what makes you happy? What do you do when you're angry?
For adults
Between the ages of three and six, children begin to name emotions and try ways to calm themselves, but they still desperately need a grown-up by their side.
Name and validate. You're angry because your tower has broken. First the emotion, then the solution.
Teach strategies when calm. Practice breathing, hugging, or the quiet corner when there's no tantrum.
Put limits on the behavior, not the emotion. You can be angry; you can't hit.
Set an example. Say it out loud how you calm down: I'm nervous, I'm going to breathe.
See a professional if the tantrums, fears or sadness are very intense, last for weeks or prevent you from playing, sleeping or going to school.
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