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Free online relationship test
11 questions, 2-3 minutes and result on the spot. If you want, we can mail it to you. It is indicative and does not replace the assessment of a professional.
Start the testWhat is a couples test and why is it important to evaluate it early?
A relationship test is a tool that assesses the health and functioning of your romantic relationship, analyzing fundamental aspects such as communication, conflict resolution, emotional and physical intimacy, trust, mutual respect, and overall satisfaction with the relationship. It identifies strengths that underpin the relationship and problem areas that need attention before they become irreversible crises.
Evaluating your relationship in time is vital because marriage problems rarely resolve on their own; in fact, they tend to worsen over time if not addressed. What begins as minor communication difficulties can evolve into chronic resentment, emotional estrangement, or even infidelity. Many couples seek therapy when the relationship is already severely damaged, significantly reducing the chances of recovery. Research shows that couples wait an average of 6 years from the start of problems until they seek professional help, during which time the damage builds up.
A relationship test allows you to quickly identify whether your relationship is healthy, if it has manageable difficulties that can be improved with effort and communication, or if it requires urgent professional intervention. Early detection of problems facilitates more effective and less painful interventions, significantly improving the chances that the relationship will not only survive but strengthen. Recognizing that your relationship needs attention is an act of commitment and love, not failure.
What are the most common symptoms of relationship problems?
Couple problems manifest themselves in multiple areas of the relationship. At the communication level, the most common symptoms include frequent arguments that lead to no resolution, inability to talk about important issues without ending in conflict, feeling not heard or understood by your partner, constant criticism or contempt toward the other, defensive communication where each one justifies their position without listening, stonewalling, or "stonewalling", and systematic avoidance of important conversations.
Many couples describe "no longer recognizing" the person they're with.
In terms of functioning and values, there are constant conflicts over recurring issues (money, parenting, political family, distribution of tasks), imbalance in commitment or effort invested in the relationship, fundamental disagreements about values or future plans, lack of respect or consideration for the other, controlling or manipulative behaviors, lying or lack of transparency, and frequent thoughts about separation or fantasies about being with another person. If you experience several of these symptoms persistently for more than six months, your relationship would likely benefit from professional help.
Take the couple test now.
Think about your relationship over the last few months. How often do the following happen?
This result is for guidance only and is not a diagnosis. If you'd like to better understand what's going on and know what to do, book a first appointment with our team: in person in Valencia or online from anywhere in Spain, with no waiting lists.
What does the couple test measure?
This test brings together 11 questions, developed by our team, about the pillars of a relationship: communication, conflict management, trust, shared time, support, intimacy, common projects and security. Score from 0 to 44: the higher, the healthier the relationship based on your answers.
It is a guidance tool: it does not replace the assessment of a professional nor is it a diagnosis.
How to interpret the results?
Relationship in serious crisis
Your relationship has serious, widespread problems that are deeply affecting both of you. There may be significant emotional distance, constant conflict, lack of intimacy, built-up resentment or even active thoughts of separating. Recommendation: your relationship needs urgent professional support. We strongly recommend seeking specialised couples therapy as soon as possible. Although the situation is serious, many couples in crisis manage to recover and rebuild their relationship with the right professional help. The key is to act now, before the damage becomes irreparable or the decision to separate is made without having truly tried to resolve the problems.
Relationship with moderate difficulties
Your relationship faces some significant challenges in areas such as communication, conflict resolution, intimacy or balance. Although there is still love and commitment, the problems are affecting the couple's satisfaction and connection. Recommendation: this is the ideal time to act before the problems get worse. Actively working on communication, setting aside quality time for the relationship and directly addressing recurring conflicts can make a significant difference. Considering couples therapy at this stage can prevent further deterioration and greatly strengthen the relationship.
Healthy relationship
Your relationship has the foundations of a healthy partnership: effective communication, mutual respect, the ability to resolve conflicts constructively, satisfying emotional and physical intimacy, and shared commitment. Recommendation: maintain and nurture what works well. Keep investing quality time together, communicating openly, showing appreciation for each other and staying emotionally and physically connected. Consider these preventive habits to protect the health of your relationship in the long term.
More about this service: Couples therapy at the Vivaldi Clinic.
Psychologists specialising in couples · Clínica Vivaldi
We are a team of health psychologists in Valencia that also serves online throughout Spain. We specialize in diagnostic evaluation and neurodivergence, trauma, childhood and youth, anxiety and depression, and we work with psychiatrists and nutritionists to make your care comprehensive.
First visit in person or online, no waiting lists. If you don't know where to start, we'll walk you through the whole process.
Frequently asked questions about the couples test
How much time do I need to take a couple's test?
Very little: it's 11 questions and it's answered in 2 or 3 minutes. When you're done, you'll see your result on the screen and, if you want, we'll send it to your email.
What to do after getting the results of the couples' test?
The test results include specific recommendations based on the status of your relationship. If the results indicate a healthy relationship, we suggest that you maintain and nurture practices that work well: quality time together, open communication, expressions of appreciation and affection. In the case of moderate difficulties, this is the ideal time to act proactively: talk openly with your partner about problem areas, make a conscious effort to improve communication and connection, and seriously consider couples therapy as an investment in the relationship. If your results indicate a serious crisis, we strongly recommend that you seek professional couples therapy as a matter of urgency. In the first session, we assessed the situation of both limbs, identified problematic patterns and strengths, and designed a treatment plan. You can contact us by WhatsApp, phone or email.
Is the mate test reliable?
It's an orientation questionnaire that our team has developed based on the aspects that most influence partner satisfaction. It's not a validated tool: it reflects your view of the relationship, and couples therapy allows you to work with both.
Is it normal to have relationship problems?
Yes, it is quite normal for couples to face difficulties and conflicts. What distinguishes successful couples from failed ones is not the absence of conflict but how they handle it. Healthy couples discuss respectfully, seek mutual understanding even when they disagree, repair after conflicts, and maintain a positive ratio of interactions (research suggests that it takes 5 positive interactions for every negative). The problem is not having difficulties, but ignoring them, allowing them to accumulate without being addressed, or falling into destructive communication patterns. Seeking help when problems persist is a sign of maturity and commitment.
Can relationship problems be solved?
Yes, the vast majority of marriage problems can be solved or at least significantly improved with effort, commitment, and the right tools. Even very difficult situations like infidelity can be overcome when there is real commitment. However, it is important to be realistic: some relationships, especially those with abuse, chronic disregard, or where one or both members no longer wish to continue, may not be recoverable. A couples therapist can help you honestly assess whether your relationship has potential for recovery and, if not, facilitate a healthy separation as possible. The prognosis is significantly better when help is sought early, before resentment and harm become too deep.
How do I know if I should try to save my relationship or break up?
This is one of the most difficult decisions couples in crisis face. Couples therapy can help you gain clarity about this decision, even if the end result is a conscious and respectful separation. At the Vivaldi Clinic, we work with both couples who want to save their relationship and those who need support to separate in a healthy way.
When should I go to couples therapy?
You should consider couples therapy when problems persist despite your attempts to resolve them, when the same conflicts are repeated over and over again without resolution, when communication has become toxic (criticism, scorn, yelling), when there is significant emotional distancing or loss of intimacy, after a major infidelity or betrayal of trust, when you are seriously considering separation, or when one or both of you have chronic resentment. Contrary to popular belief, it is not necessary to wait until the relationship is "destroyed" before seeking help; in fact, the sooner you seek help, the better the prognosis. Neither need both be equally convinced at first; many therapies begin with one member more motivated than the other. At the Vivaldi Clinic, we create a safe, neutral, nonjudgmental space where both of you can express yourselves and work to rebuild your connection. If your partner is reluctant to come, sometimes it helps to frame therapy as "an investment in our relationship" rather than "fixing what's broken".